I have decided to start new weekly posts called “Chit Chat Tuesday” where I steer away from beauty, makeup, fashion etc. and talk about a random subject of my choice. For my first post I decided to make it about something that I feel is quite an important subject, that being appearance insecurities/self acceptance.
I think it’s safe to say everyone is insecure about something whether it’s your weight, your skin or your hair etc. I for example have always been insecure about my skin, my boobs, my under eye dark circles, my nose, the list can go on! I’m constantly forking out money to try and control/fix these “issues” that in the long run I cannot change and sometimes I think to myself “why am I doing this?”
In this social media based society we live in we are constantly surrounded by beautiful people who all fit into a certain look, leading us to believe that if we do not fit that specific criteria we are not good looking enough, which in my opinion is a very unhealthy way to live. Every day i’ll see an Instagram model on my feed and i’ll think “god I wish I had her hair, or her nose” and scroll down to see multiple other people with the same perfect features I wish I had. Society is constantly changing its appearance “trends” and if we do not fit these “trends” we immediately jump to thinking we’re ugly or we don’t meet these standards, as humans we look at ourselves every day in the mirror and the first thought we tend to have is negative on our appearance, whether it’s a spot on our face or dark circles. We then go to cover these “imperfections” we see with makeup in the hope that no one will see, only to find another problem that we contemplate on fixing.
For years I struggled with acne to the point where people would constantly comment on it, from people in my class to strangers in the hallways. I even recall a girl walking up to me one day only to say “Err you’re so spotty, your face is disgusting.” I was fully aware of how bad my skin was at the time and was in the process of taking acne medications to fix it, I believed what she said and believed my face was disgusting and I was ugly.
Eventually I cleared my skin only to realise I had some minor scarring from the acne, which became my new focus, my hatred for my other imperfections had also intensified. After years of trying to fix the unfix-able I have come to realise that even if I fixed these problems I would never be fully fixed, as I would find something new that I would need to change about myself, making it an endless cycle of self hatred.
After realising this I am now in the process of accepting myself, I will still always have these features I hate about my appearance and that will never change, but instead of trying to fix something that isn’t broken i’ve accepted that it is a part of me and it’s how I was made. I read a quote saying “If we could create ourselves before knowing society’s beauty standards, how would we look,” showing us that the idea of what is beautiful and what is ugly is nothing but a myth that we’ve been brainwashed into believing is true. We need to stop being so hard on ourselves and stop nit picking at every little thing. No matter what we “fix” we will always find a new problem and comparing ourselves to others is an unhealthy way to live. Beauty is in all of us and something you are insecure about someone else loves/wants.
I hope this post has helped any one struggling to accept the way they look.
Thank you for reading!
Lots Of Love x